Dating

10 Little Things You Can Do To Make First-Time Sex Less Awkward

Sleeping with someone new for the first time is rarely a flawless, perfectly orchestrated sexual experience. There are a lot of unknowns to factor in, which can make things a bit awkward if things don’t go completely according to plan. Here are a few things you can do to make your next first time a better time.

  1. Have the condom ready. ‘Tis better to have a condom somewhere in your dresser drawers than to not have a condom at all, but you’ll save yourself a lot of trouble if you know exactly where it is before you even need it. Preferably, it’s tucked inside a box in your bedside drawer for easy access. It’s not a complete mood killer to have to search a couple of minutes, but it makes things go a lot smoother if there’s as little break in the action as possible.
  2. Really emphasize the foreplay. Making sure you get the chance to develop a good sexual vibe before the actual sex takes place can work wonders for making both of you more comfortable with each other. Jumping straight to P in V can make the whole experience feel rushed, which won’t do anything to calm your nerves or hers. Spend some time enjoying each other, and it’ll feel a lot more natural when it’s time for the main event.
  3. Clean your room beforehand. Not only is it kind of embarrassing to have to bring a new girl into a messy room, but it also makes the mood a bit less sexy when you both have to trip over clothes and who-knows-what-else before climbing into a bed that might also be covered in clothes. Maintaining a clean room at all times is the easiest way to avoid this, but if you’re on the messy side and expect to get some action, make sure your room is presentable before she comes over.
  4. Laugh. First-time sex is never like it is in the movies. It’s usually a bit clumsy, especially as you both figure out what the other person likes. If you accidentally bump heads, there’s a weird noise, or a maneuver doesn’t go quite as planned, just laugh about it. There will be way less tension if you can approach the situation lightheartedly instead of taking it all too seriously.
  5. Take your shoes and socks off at the door. Fumbling to pull your pants down over your shoes and then having to deal with the conundrum of how to sexily remove your socks isn’t the worst thing that can happen when you’re about to get it on, but it’s not exactly convenient, either. The fix is so easy, though: just take them both off when you walk in the house. They’ll need to come off anyway, so it’s best to just eliminate the extra bit of work as soon as you can.
  6. Make sure you or she has a way to get home. Whether it’s at her place or yours, whether you part ways that night or in the morning, make sure there’s actually a way for you two to part ways. The last thing either of you want is to feel trapped at the other person’s house, so be willing to drive her back to her car or use a rideshare app on your phone if neither of you drive.
  7. Get her off before intercourse. The excitement of sleeping with someone new can cause you to finish a bit early. Or maybe you’re just worried about whether or not she’ll have a good time. No matter what, your worries can be calmed by making the effort to make her climax before your penis ever goes inside her. She’s unlikely to be disappointed with anything that comes afterward as long as you put her needs first.
  8. Invest in baby wipes. A friend told me this advice once, and it damn near changed my life. Keep baby wipes in the bathroom so both of you can freshen up before sex and clean up afterward. It prevents the need to completely get undressed for a quick wash-up in the shower, and they’re so quick and convenient that you don’t have to worry about killing the mood when you make a trip to the restroom before the action starts.
  9. If it happens at your place, seriously, just let her stay the night. You can peace right out of her house if you want to go home to your own bed, but don’t ever be That Guy that makes a girl wonder if she’s overstepping boundaries by not making the trip home late at night. Let her know right off the bat that she’s welcome to stay, and let her make her own choice from there. It eliminates a lot of uncertainty on her part, and even if it only ends up being a one-night fling, she’ll appreciate the gesture.
  10. Ask before doing. This is the rule you should always follow with anyone you have any kind of sexual relationship with, but it’s especially important during first-time sex when you have no idea what your partner might be into. Double-check and get verbal consent before escalating things even a little bit, and never assume that she’ll be fine with whatever you want to do. Not only is this important for your safety and hers, but it also eliminates any uncertainty that both people involved are totally cool with whatever is happening.