Dating

10 Things You Need To Be Honest About On A First Date

The first date is supposed to be light and fun, but there are some important things you should tell your (potential) partner about ASAP so that you don’t waste each other’s time and keep the spark going strong.  Lay these things on the table from date one and you’ll be better off in the long run.

  1. How long you’ve been single. Chances are, she’ll ask you about this, so be open. You might be tempted to hide the fact that you’ve only been single for three weeks, but it’s better to go for honesty. Besides, women find out things! You’ve been warned.
  2. What you want. If you haven’t talked about this before meeting, now’s the time to get it out there. Mumbling about how you don’t like labels or want to “hang out” doesn’t cut it. Be real with her about what you want. If you’re only looking for sex, tell her. If you want a long-term relationship, be honest about it. It’ll save you both time to know if you’re on the same page or not.
  3. If you see a second date on the cards. Save this for the end of the date before you say goodbye. If the date went well and you’d like to see her again, tell her! She’ll appreciate that much more than waiting for you to text her within three days.
  4. Your living situation. If you live alone, with roommates, or with your best friend who happens to look like a Victoria Secret model, now’s the time to tell her. Obviously, you want this to come up naturally during a “getting to know each other” conversation, but it’s important. Just think: you don’t want her to suggest coming to your place before you tell her that you live with the sloppiest roommates ever. Prepare her from the start so there are no nasty surprises.
  5. Your religious and/or political views. Now’s not the time to get into a heavy discussion about these touchy subjects, but if they’re important to you, it doesn’t hurt to mention your beliefs and views. But then move on to more positive, lighter topics so you don’t kill the mood.
  6. Something you think might be a deal-breaker for her. It might be that you’re a recovering alcoholic or drug addict. It might be that you live with that Victoria Secret-lookalike. It might be that you still live in your parents’ garage. It might be that you’re divorced and have three kids. Whatever you think could possibly be a deal-breaker for her is something you should tell her on the first date, ASAP. Yes, it’s tough to do so, especially if you really like her and don’t want to push her away, but she’ll appreciate your openness. It might not even be a big deal for her!
  7. Your marital status. “Kinda single” isn’t a good enough answer to this question. Maybe you’re single but recently divorced, or you and your wife have been separated for so many months that it feels like you’re a single guy. Not good enough. Tell her your exact relationship status. She deserves to know it.
  8. Any recent big life events. Have you recently purchased a home or changed careers? Tell her about them. These life events are awesome because they give her a real view into your life and your future goals, which is great for getting to know each other on a first date.
  9. Your family. She probably wants to know if you have three sisters and how close you all are, as well as who your parents are, so tell her a bit about your family. However, you really don’t want to get into heavy issues concerning them. Now’s not the time to talk about how your dad’s battling with a drug addiction and your mom’s having an affair. Too much, too soon! You want to show her you’re inviting her into your life by telling her about your loved ones, but do so gently.
  10. Your work. Tell her about your work and what you do. You spend so many hours at the office a week and it’s an important part of your life. It also gives her a heads-up about how busy you are. However, don’t moan about work drama or tell her how much money you earn. TMI! The most important thing is to focus on why you’re in your chosen career and keep it positive if you can. If work isn’t a fountain of optimism, then move the subject onto what gets you up in the morning.